Beauty From Ashes – Elina Yohannan

My hands were tired, I didn’t think I could lift them up to You anymore

The numbness of my heart wouldn’t let me feel Your love like I used to

Honestly, I was just so done trying and failing — EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.

It felt as though I was sinking in my helplessness

Not knowing what to do to get out of it

Did I feel like my soul could find rest? No

Raising a cry for help? Didn’t think much could come out of it either

Hoping for hope? I was starting to believe it was a joke

Forget my future, my present looked blurry I didn’t even realize when this wave of devastation came crashing down on me

The weight of brokenness and frustration had taken over

Pointless pain seemed like the only real thing in my life

But then I heard You say, “Though the mountains be shaken and the hills be removed, 

yet my unfailing love for you will not be shaken nor my covenant of peace be removed.”

And then You said, “Do not fear, for I have redeemed you;

I have called you by name; you are mine. 

When you go through deep waters, I will be with you.

When you go through rivers of difficulty, you will not drown.

When you walk through the fire of oppression,

you will not be burned up; the flames will not consume you.”

Wrestling with my thoughts and trying to make sense 

of how You just wouldn’t agree to give up on me, I was back at Your feet

I did not know where else to go

I thought maybe I’d find peace everlasting in You

Maybe You could turn this nightmare into something beautiful

Just maybe…

I remember asking if You could do something

As my heart secretly wished for a miracle

And my eyes fought hard to keep that ray of hope

You simply answered, “Be still and know that I am God.”

And that was all I needed… 

Knowing, trusting and living it has made all the difference.

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